ET can phone home, but the number will be disconnected

After 10 years, I will be disconnecting my house phone.  I have had the same number since I moved out on my own.  It has been an interesting number -- receiving calls from current clients looking for the client who used to own it.  Nothing quite as disconcerting as a client asking for their friend and then saying "Bronwyn? Is that you?"

Since then, I have enjoyed my phone number.  It has done me well and housed numerous other people too.  But now, that number receives calls from three groups: family, people I don't want to talk to, and telemarketers.  Since family knows my cell number, they just call me there most of the time anyway and I would prefer if people didn't know how to reach me anyway, so I think I'm done.

It will be hard to wrap my head around having no house phone, but really, when I'm at home, I don't want to talk to anyone anyway.  I hope the next owner of the number enjoys it as much.

I'm sick and apparently *someone* doesn't love me anymore

About 25 minutes ago, I had a specific number of followers for this blog.  Now, I have one less.  Ouch.  Was it something I said?

Perhaps it is that I have, for the umpteenth* week in a row been quite half-assed about blogging.  I keep thinking of things, but then it's 2am and I'm groping for a pen or trying to type on my Blackberry and then The Guy is like "What are you doing and why are you tapping?" so I give up.  By the next morning, I have forgotten all the important things to tell you.

Except that I wrote "standing on my soap box" at 2am and I don't know why.

I am sick.  AGAIN.  I feel like I have been sick every other month for the last 3 years.  I don't remember even being sick this often before, but that could be because Mom had a strict "fever or vomit" policy when it came to sickness.  Now that I'm working in the real world, if I cough on something I am instantly sprayed with Lysol and sent home so I don't infect anyone.  It's fine and all, but I'm getting tired of it.

This week, I felt great.  Then *bam* I went from sniffling for an afternoon to a row of 30 sneezes that dislocated my left shoulder and then a sore throat that felt like glass shards cemented into a fence top for protection.  In a matter of hours, I went from fine to death.

I guess I thought that with the Celiac's thing diagnosed and under control, my immune system would start to bounce back.  I know Celiac's is an auto-immune disease, but I assumed no bread = some better semblance of health than I had in the last while.  No such luck.

So, instead of sleeping, I am mouth breathing, knitting a sweater on commission for a dog in Calgary, and feeling otherwise like a piece of poop.  I should try and sleep, but I've had an hour in the last 36 hours and I feel fine.  It might be all the caffeine I had today in tea and all the sugar I've had in the ginger ale, but I feel great.  I mean, except for the not breathing, sore throat, aches and pains thing.

Also, I beat my sister-in-law's score on Facebook Bejeweled, so I'm pretty much riding that high.  Suck on that, Melanie!!!!!



Update: I was going to write about umpteenth here.  When I was a kid, I thought it was a word my mom made up.  When I heard someone else use it, I was pretty sure Mom was famous.

Dude, I've had a lot of cold medication today.

Motivation, where for art thou?

I have been lacking in motivation for awhile now.  Not just the motivation to get things done, but the motivation to do anything.  Apart from breathing and using the bathroom, I've been a rather large, unassuming lump occupying whichever surface I managed to drag myself to from the bed.

If I get that far.

Now, I'm not depressed, I'm not bored, I'm not sad, I'm not... anything.  In fact, I'm just fine.  I just don't want to do anything.  Not read, not blog, not knit, not watch TV, not eat, nothing.

It's very odd really, but I'm quite content in my nothingness.

Although, I have been online shopping, so I guess that's something.  Right?

Wearing my sunglasses at night

I love to drive at night.  At night, it's just me and the road.  The dark envelopes you and your car in an intimate way.  The kind of intimacy that means you aren't just driving "home", you're driving "somewhere".  Somewhere that is lined with lights and goes on forever.

When I'm driving in the dark, I'm in a sleek, black sports car with the top down.  My hair is perfect and covered in a flattering scarf while I sport my over-sized sunglasses.  My radio is playing a great driving song and I am completely free.

I drive with the wind.  I turn corners without slowing. I am alone and confident and powerful.

Just me and my car in the dark.

Not enough hours in the day

Normally, I can keep up with the real world and the blog world, but this week has been different.  I should apologize, but sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

And this week, that meant ignore you.

After a strenuous day on Monday, I flew out to Edmonton to help LynnieC pack up her belongings.  We spent all Tuesday packing and cleaning and attempting to rent a vehicle for the next morning.  (Guess what?  Procrastination is hereditary.)

Wednesday, we packed up 3 van loads and two car loads and moved all the way across the dang city in rush hour traffic.  Remind me never to live in a city where I cannot get from one end to the other in less than 20 minutes.  Tis the suck.

Of course, Wednesday afternoon was also when there was an emergency in The Guy's family and I was in another province.  It never fails.  So, we busted our butts to get the moving done (and did so in record time with a little help from her friends -- who I suggested lose her number before she has to move again) and hauled butt to North Battleford to spend the night with Grandma.

Today, we hit the road bright and shiny -- with the exception of both the bright and the shiny.  And we made it home just as The Guy came home from work.  We planned supper, I went to the chiropractor (I had thrown out my ribs a week before and the moving did not help put them in place) and then came home for a quick nap before work at 10pm.

It's been a whirl wind.  I am very tired and now I have 3 more night shifts ahead of me.  On a cheque weekend.  I'm so screwed.

At this point, I can hardly wait to crawl into bed with the dog and sleep away the day.  Monty will be happy.

He doesn't do well with less than 20 hours sleep.

I've been interviewed!

I mentioned a few days (or weeks, who can remember!) about joining the new group Tribal Blogs.  I have been enjoying my time there, scoping out other sites and getting insight from other writers.  While I was there, I ran across an open invitation to submit yourself to an interview by fellow blogger The Redheaded Stepchild and be spotlighted on her other blog Say Anything.  I sent her an email and said I would be up for it if she was.  The very next day (or the one after, who can remember!) I got her questions in my inbox.

They were good questions too.  I had to actually think about things.  I hate that, but I did it anyway.  So, go look at my interview and revel, not only in my wit, but also in my limitless need to seek others approval.

Wheatless home on the prairies

Since my sister Ky announced in February she was diagnosed with Celiac's disease, we knew it was a matter of time before the rest of us had to get tested.  We all have similar symptoms and have been going to doctors for years with limited success.  Now that we know it exists in our family, we can get tested.

I got home from Victoria and immediately went to the doctor to get the test underway.  One big blood test later (seriously, I don't think I had blood left when they were done) I had to wait for the results.  Since I've had numerous other health issues going on, the one week waiting period turned into three in order for all the results to come in at the same time.

Wednesday was that time.

I walked into the doctor's office, got into my paper gown (the physical was that day too, oh joy) and waited.  I've been a bit anxious about what the results of the Celiac test would be, so finally being so close to an answer was a bit nerve racking.

My lovely doctor came in, sat down, told me the results of the test and immediately took my blood pressure.  Not such a good choice it turns out.  Perhaps she should have reversed that?

I have Celiac's disease.  My levels were far and beyond the highest of the measurable scales.  The levels that were "extremely high" were left in the dust by my results.  For once, I'm an overachiever.  Yay me.

It means going on a gluten-free diet.  No wheat.  No bread.  No pasta.  No cereal.  Forever. 

I've had a month to digest this (pardon the pun) but it was still kind of a kick to the junk.  I know I will adjust.  I will be forced to eat healthier and this is awesome.  However, I have to admit, I am in mourning.  It's going to be a big adjustment.  I'm going to have to learn how to cook healthier, want to cook healthier, eat healthier, want to eat healthier.  I'm going to have to stop eating a family sized box of Mini Wheats a month.

I know it will be good for me.  I will likely lose weight (Dr. figures my body can't process the gluten so it stores it -- just in cases).  I will not be as tired.  I will not be as irritable.  I will not be as gassy.  (The world rejoices at that one.  Especially Monty and The Guy.  Dutch oven gets old fast.)  I will feel better. 

Really, I should be looking on the up side of this.  It will be nice not to have bi-polar intestines with the emotional stability of a pubescent teenage girl in the hysterics of unrequited love. 

But I will really miss Mini Wheats.

January non-resolution recap

Sometime in the early part of this month, I made a list.  I promptly forgot all about it.  So, to recap and remind, here it is below with what I did and didn't and sort of did do.

• To finish my thank you cards by the end of the second week of January and mail them. DONE! JAN 10
• To empty and sort the junk drawers  NOT DONE.  Oops.  On to next month.
• To go through my closet and pare down the amount of clothes I have in there. DONE! JAN 22
• To go through a couple of the boxes now littering the basement. Pare down, delegate, toss, etc.  SORT OF DONE.  I got rid of three more boxes and will clean out a few more when Lyn comes to visit.
• Organize my sewing area and set up my sewing machine. SORT OF DONE.  I have organized the room better, started planning where things will go, but still no table set up.  I keep forgetting to get it from the church.
• To eat more responsibly this includes: SORT OF DONE, BUT NOT REALLY  This I have not done so well with.  I have brought more lunches to work (Yay me!) but the Tim's and take out is still my weakness.  
• One take out or restaurant meal a week
• One Timmy's tea a week (one cream and sugar)  
• Limited pop intake
• Bring lunches to work
• Small amounts of snack or dessert -- not nothing, but just a little of some things
• Walk the dog more often or for longer at one time  NOT DONE.  It's been -30 and/or blizzarding steadily for the last few weeks.  When the weather was good, we went.  Not good, not going.
• Work out on the Wii and the elliptical every week (at least 3 times in total) SORT OF DONE I still haven't tried the elliptical, but the Wii has been fun.  I've worked out on it at least three times a week (even going five one week!) and will keep at it.  I haven't lost any weight, but I'm feeling better and hoping that counts.

So, for February, I plan to keep hacking away at this list.  I would like to lose one inch of my waist (so far, I've lost it but it's under my belly) and to try not to overdo it when I go out to see Kyfor a week.

Miscellaneous garbage

The dog has been staring at me for the last hour trying to get me to go to bed. I got up off the couch and tried to shoo him into the bedroom to sleep with The Guy, but nothing doing. So I made a bed of his favourite blanket in his favourite chair and he condescended to sleeping there for awhile. Try explaining to a dog that you're working on something and cannot be rushed. Dogs are all about "hey, feed me, walk me, let me out to pee, pay attention to me!!!!" I hear kids are like that too, but you can totally just ignore them.

I am readying myself for another set of nights. I struggle these days to stay up til midnight 10pm on my days off, so suddenly trying to be awake til 8am is a real kick to the shins.

Of course, now that the dog is finally settled, I'm done my project, done my episode of NCIS, and I'm kind of bored. Maybe I should go to bed.

Happy Fool's Day!

Welcome to April. Have a look around. You'll like it here. I've declared there will be no snow and a lot more fun.

I have taken on another challenge for the month of April. I'm going to do another month of NaBloPoMo. The topic for the month is Growing (Up). I thought it was a great topic, so I am going to regale you with stories of my childhood. From my perspective. And then you can read the comments to see my siblings completely argue that it ever happened that way at all. Whatever. It's my blog, you can bite it.

Alright, already

Because my father is convinced something is wrong if I don't post for a few days, I am now here to tell you I have not died. I have not been overwhelmed by tuberculosis, nor assaulted by a common thug. I have not had a mental health break down, nor have I been admitted to hospital after eating an entire family sized bag of Mini Eggs.

I was having a good weekend and didn't feel like checking my email or posting. THE HORROR.

I was quite busy all weekend. On Friday afternoon, I went with my SiL-to be and picked out the flowers for all the bouquets in my wedding. We decided on Stargazer lilies, deep red roses, and a little nice smelling cute flower whose name I cannot remember. I am super happy with my choice and I think it is going to be awesome. We went out for drinks and supper after that. Then I spent the rest of the night watching NCIS reruns.

Saturday morning, I went with The Guy to pick out new glasses for me. I got two new pairs -- one with sunglasses! -- and should get them in a week. I'm pumped for them. Once they arrive, I will take pictures. I've damaged my current pair so badly that being able to see without smears and scratches will be a novel event.

Saturday afternoon, The Guy and I went to see his grandfather in the hospital. He's doing much better after his fall and might be released soon.

Saturday night, The Guy and I went out to celebrate our 2 year anniversary. We went to an all you can eat buffet and then watched a movie. It was great. The Guy bought me a present and I got him a kick in the ass. I totally got the better deal of both those things!! The Guy bought me ALL 5 SEASONS OF ANGEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm thrilled.

Of course, now I have to think of something awesome to give him. Although, it is hard to top a kick in the ass.

I believe this should be called 'Miscellaneous'

I tried to go to bed at 9 so I would be ready for my first day of work in well over a week. I'm still not feeling 100%, but Lord knows if I waited for that I would never go to work.

First, I woke up at 10 when Ky called -- no big deal, how could she know I would go to bed before three for the first time since December. I had to let the dogs out because they assumed if I was awake it meant they had to go out and then I had to chase them back in while wearing flip flops. In the deep snow. I went back to sleep easy enough after defrosting my feet, but woke up at 1:30am wide awake.

I was bored, so I strolled the internet. My computer had died because I left it on and forgot to plug it in. Then I noticed my backspace button isn't working really well. Which is annoying, because you know what button I use all the time? The backspace. Well, that and the tab button, but it's already missing it's lid and I just use the little plastic thing that's left to hit it.

What was my point? Oh yeah, I should be sleeping and instead my computer is falling apart!

I have exactly 5 hours before I need to be awake. If I go to sleep now that is.

Miscellaneous crap

Somehow I have to think of something to say. I'm still annoyed from yesterday, but not enough to write anything scathing to scare the living crap out of Joe. I'm feeling better than I have been this week despite having worked at the shelter last night as an extra shift.

This week, I signed up for Qwitter which tells me when people stop following me on Twitter and why. Then I twittered "Boogers. Boogers for everyone!!" as just something to say to be funny and someone unfollowed me. Seriously. You're offended by boogers? Alrighty then. Go follow someone else. Someone with something smart and useful to say. You're not wanted here.

I've got nothing.

Here. I will make a list. I love lists. Things I am thankful for today:

• quiet time with puppies and no TV or radio noise
• my raise may come in before Christmas
• the flu seems to have passed me by
• plans with crazybarefeet for Friday night dessert and dishing
• my sisters are coming home soon
• supper tonight with The Guy
• my family is coming home for Christmas (minus the father and stepmother)

I really have nothing else. What a waste of time. I apologize.

I am participating in NaBloPoMo. It's almost over. Sigh of relief.

Random and useless... just like me

Today is Thursday, right? The 6th. Ok. I can deal with that.

Here are some things I am doing today:

- nothing
- wishing I was at home doing nothing
- catching up on my blog reading
- wishing I could eat something bad for me
- wishing I was independently wealthy (seriously, what up Dad? Why is we not rich and lazy?)
- thinking that even 2 days of eating healthy is for the dogs
- although, I wouldn't want to eat dog food so I guess it's ok
- thinking of stuff

Do you like stuff?


I am participating in NaBloPoMo for November. Why? I hate you. It's true.

What's with today today?

I have had a busy day. I worked until 8am, slept til 2pm. Went to the chiropractor and massage therapist, who each beat me with a stick and now I hurt all over rather than just in a few places. The MT suggested I skip the gym today because I would be too sore. Her medical suggestion? McDonald's and a nap on the couch. Why can I never listen to people in authority?

Instead, I got a hankering for zucchini and mushrooms. So, I went to the store. Yes, I have no friends, I have to buy zucchini. But in asking if my MT knew anyone who had zucchini to give away, I got a bag of garden potatoes from her so it wasn't too bad.

I came home, walked the dogs, fed the dogs, made myself a zucchini, mushroom, onion and steak stir fry, bathed the dogs, cleaned the bathroom top to bottom because of the dogs, washed all the dishes and vacuumed the living room and kitchen. *taking a deep breath*

Now I am making chocolate zucchini muffins and wondering what to do for the other 3 hours until bed time. Not having room mates (and being sucked into watching reruns of So You Think You Can Dance) certainly keeps you from being distracted.

What am I doing hangin' round?

I don't feel like going to bed. I guess that's a good thing being that I start nights tomorrow (well, today now) and should be trying to get back to a schedule. I have been more productive this week than I have since.... um.... June. Well, good to know it only takes a year or so to get the fire under my butt going. Mind you, being "more productive" essentially means being productive at all and not spending 6 hours a day (or thereabouts, who can remember?) watching Monarch of the Glen.

I have made a list and even started crossing things off of it. It's very exciting and fills me with glee. Every time I cross something off, I think "Take that sucker". Sometimes if I'm really annoyed I just write my sister's name and cross it off out of spite. Doesn't do anything, but it makes me feel vindicated.

I have finally organized my paperwork to do my taxes. Yes, I should have done them months ago, but I don't have to pay the government so they don't give a flying rats caboose when I do them. I am very much looking forward to my return, but also well aware I have spent it about 7 times over. Ah the joys of having no skills with money. "What is money? It's just tiny bits of paper that float in and out of our lives." (I'm paraphrasing that quote because I am too tired to look it up, but there was a time I could quote that whole movie by heart. Cyber kisses to whoever knows it - unless you've watched it with me at any given time.)

And here I am wasting time while my life passes me by. I should do something useful, but really, I've burned myself out by being all Miss-Getting-Things-Done. I'm taking a break. May should be enough.

Simple plans

If I were a lady of leisure and had unlimited money, this is what I would do.*

I would build a house and decorate it. And then, I would enjoy every bit of it. I would never clean it myself, but I would have a staff to clean and care for it and someone to cook for me. I have the whole house planned out in my mind.

It would be an open layout bungalow.** It would have many bedrooms so I could have my whole family stay with me to visit. The kitchen would be very big and have an island where I could roll cookie dough on it without running into anything. There would be a huge fridge that would fit everything I need in it and never run out of space for salad dressings or jams.

My dream though is about the bathroom. A huge corner tub that requires steps up to it. I want the walls around the tub to be glass that you can't see through. I want to be able to soak in silence and happiness with water that actually is deep enough to sit in and stays warm for more than 15 mins at a time. I want there to be plants in there, but again, I don't want to care for them.***

I need a big yard for the dogs and I to hang out in. Something with shade in one area and sun in another and a pool for the pups.

I'm a very simple girl and I have simple needs. I just want a huge house, a full staff and no responsibilities.


*I would try not to make the begining of my post sound like a poem, but that may be beyond my ability.
**Why a bungalow? Because my mother was in a wheelchair and now I will never take the chance that I will not be able to get around in my own house.
***Ky can do that when she visits.

Perhaps in a haiku?

It is hard to take a threat from someone seriously when they unintentionally rhyme.

Channelling Martha

Since I am spending Christmas with The Guy and his family, I knew I had to come up with something to impress The Mother. I think I did okay the first time I met her, but I want that trend to continue. So, I decided it is all about the Christmas gift/ Hostess gift.

The Guy keeps telling me it's a pretty casual affair and I don't need to bring a gift. To me, that's just wrong. So, I am getting a gift for his grandparents and one for his parents. But honestly, that means "his grandmother" and "his mother".

Grandparents got the brown suede couch throw I bought on Boxing Day sale last year. I figured old people are always cold, this is a good thing. I threw in a really cute ornament I got for a dollar at Dollarama. Threw it all into a decorative bag and boom super impressive.

The Mother was a different story. I had decided on a centre piece or a decorative thingy for her table. Now, to buy or to make was the challenge. I found a great one for $20, but I thought that was too much - both for our budding relationship of girlfriend and guy's mother and for my wallet. So, I decided to make one.

Here it is. It took me longer to scrape the price tag from the bottom of the vase than it did to make it.

Directions:
What I did was buy two things of potpourri mix (one scented apple cinnamon and one plain), two vases and a piece of ribbon.

• Mixed the green potpourri with the red one.
• Threw the mix in the vase.
• Tied it with the ribbon.
• Cut some tissue paper type stuff and shoved it in the top to keep the smell trapped.
• Revelled in my talent and brilliance.
• Decided to take a picture to show off.

I am the greatest gift giver of all time. And now I have an extra one made for someone else and enough to make a third - possibly a fourth. Sweet deal, eh?

Shattered childhood

When we were kids, my family had a set of glasses I loved. Every family in the 80s had them. The collectable Disney glasses of their greatest family cartoons. Snow White, Peter Pan, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Bambi. You could collect them with every gasoline fill up at Co-Op or some such thing. I have no idea what happened to them, but over the years, they disappeared.

I was thrilled when I found three glasses in perfect condition just lazing around Value Village waiting for a bargain hunter and thrill seeker to take them home. And take them home I did. For $1.99 a glass.

I used Snow White's glass. It was my favourite. I could use it for water and not forget which glass was mine and have to get a new one. I used it for chocolate milk and it didn't have nooks and crannies for the milk to get lost in. It was the greatest glass of all time.

And then... I tried to sweep the floor. This is what happened when I reached for the broom.


I will be holding a memorial for it later this week. But don't worry. I'll be ok.