I've always had only a few good friends. I have a tendency to be the kind of person who does not make friends easily. In my youth, I was irritating and had little social skills. In my teens, I was depressed, covered in acne, and violently shy. In my early 20s, I was uncomfortable in my own skin and only spoke to people I knew.
I always had a safe net of friends (actually: sisters and cousins and kids of my parents' friends) so I didn't need to make friends. However, most of my friends who were not my sisters or cousins lived in other provinces. Then my cousins moved away. Then my sisters moved away.
And then there was one.
I had The Guy and I had Monty, but felt lacking in the female friendship department.
It was then I realized: women need their friends and friendships are hard work.
Have I mentioned I hate hard work?
However, more and more, I've needed the female element. I need the things that only female friends can provide. There is a level of camaraderie, companionship, and communication that can only be understood by another female.
Don't get me wrong. I love The Guy. We can sit and talk for hours about anything. Hopes, dreams, futures, disappointments, achievements, etc. He's my best friend. And yet... there are times when I need to discuss things with someone who is not him. And that is where girl friends come into play.
I have a firm belief that a woman needs someone who fulfills one of each of the following: a professional mentor, a maternal friend, a spiritual guide, a spiritual equal, a person to be foolish with, a person to discuss relationships with (e.g. sex!!!), a person who pushes you to be more than you thought you could be, someone to be quiet with, and someone who knows everything about you. These can be filled by one person or many. It's just important that we have them.
Sometimes friends come and go in our lives as we change and grow. Some pick up where they left off -- whether it be days or weeks or years. I've realized I need to work harder to create, cultivate, and cherish my female friends.