My grandma lives in North Battleford while the rest of us live in other cities and it is difficult to keep tabs on her. She is still living on her own (now in a smaller apartment thanks to her moving skills) and is still, relatively, with it. However, she is on her own -- no other family lives nearby but for the good people of the local church who make sure she's doing alright.
Since our Mom died, the bulk of the family contact has landed on Ky's shoulders, while (because of my proximity and meanness) the bulk of the financial and behavioural issues lands on my shoulders. I don't mind, I love my Grandma, but she is turning out to be rather... difficult.
Grandma is a stubborn woman who has been taking care of others since she could walk. In her mind, she does for herself and for everyone else and believes she would be a terrible burden if she ever required assistance. In her mind, she does not need any help, so why would she ask.
Today, I ran into a relative who lives in the suite below Grandma. He and his wife keeps tabs on her, do repairs, take her places, help her with things, etc. He also narcs on her to me when she insists on doing things she shouldn't.
Like climbing on the cupboard drawers to reach the top shelf. Or, walking downtown in the deepest heat of summer. Or, numerous other things that (apparently) old ladies do to get into trouble.
His concern today was one I've heard before. Grandma insists on walking to appointments and the mall on her own. She will not ask for someone to take her as she does not want to be a bother. However, there are many problems with this: she lives outside of town, has to walk quite a long way, no one knows where she has gone, and the most important...
She is almost 91.
He caught her crossing the field and climbing the barbed wire fence.
Now it's my job to call her and yell at her about it. Not that she will listen to me.
Raising my Grandma long distance is a lot like raising a teenager long distance. Except that instead of pregnancy scares I have to worry about broken hips.