Ky left for Ukraine last week. A few days ago, she sent me this email so I would be prepared when I arrive. It has taken all my willpower not to cancel my trip right now. I'm pretty sure I am going to die. If so, remember me fondly -- also, skinnier and with bigger boobs.
1. It is hot as hades here. I haven't been this hot since Mexico. Good news: Tanya and Dad's place is air-conditioned.
2. When you get off the plane in Ukraine, the whole planes worth of people piles on to a teeny-tiny bus to be taken to customs. Hold your purse close. Hold the bus handles tight. Good news: the people are forgiving of foreigners who stand on their toes.
3. Dad is blind and will not see you until you are close enough to touch him in the airport. Good news: He's 8 feet taller than everyone, so he's easy to spot.
4. The Kyiv metro is terrifying, and because of #1 on the list, everyone stinks. Good news: you stink too.
5. Men wear white pants. There is no good news.
6. Women wear thongs and very tight pants. Also no good news.
Ah Ky!! This is hilarious :) You'll have a good time..at least there is plumbing!
ReplyDeleteHA! And also, gross.
ReplyDelete