Two days at Grandma's house

I love spending time at Grandma's house. I always come back more relaxed than I arrived. I also come back with a full arsenal of things Grandma has said and done. She just can't help herself. She never ceases to amuse (and frustrate) me to no end.
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I brought my wedding dress with me so that I could show Grandma. I knew she would be excited and want to be apart of it. I put it on and modelled it for her and my aunt the first afternoon I arrived. Grandma was thrilled by the dress. Less thrilled by the shoes. She was horrified that I would be wearing red.

The next day, I put the dress on to show my sister and my cousin. I walked out into the main room and showed the girls. Grandma came out from her room behind me. "Are you wearing that again??", she exclaimed.
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Grandma is always trying to feed us. She does not take no for an answer. She pushes cookies and cheese puffs like a dealer with crack cocaine. Then, as though she isn't force feeding us everything in her fridge, she innocently asks if we've been gaining weight.

As I was packing to leave, she came into my room offering me a tray full of butter tarts. I had just had lunch moments before (including pie!) and so declined the dessert.

You don't want a tart?
No, thank you. I'm good.
You don't like tarts. (This was not a question. It was a statement -- of indignation.)
I do like tarts. But I'm full. Thanks anyway.
Okay. I'll go get you a muffin.
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A note written above Grandma's phone reads: "March 5, 2005. Ella's first birthday in glory." Um... okay. That's one way to look at it. Cheerful, even.
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Grandma's favourite guest of the entire weekend, was our friend Shannon's new friend (Pronounced Who - wee. I don't know how to spell his name, so I won't even attempt to get it right.) This friend was 6'6" tall and as thin as could be. He was sweet and kind, and my Grandma LOVED him. So much so that she hugged him. Which is pretty much the cutest thing I've ever seen. Grandma barely tops 5 feet, so she hardly came above his waist. But he was so kind and gentle with her, that I have a feeling next time he's in town, Grandma will be letting me know my room is no longer available for me.