chirp, chirp, chirp

Alternate title: When dead Mom jokes fall flat.

There are two types of people. The kind that are sad (and likely considered appropriate) about death and the kind that remember the funeral where a kid bumped into a fake wall and pushed over an old lady who was standing on the other side. We mock it in an order not to give it more power than it deserves.

In other words, we are sick bastards about it.

In our cases, we make "Dead Mom jokes". They are only funny to those of us who've had the experience happen and who revel in making other people uncomfortable. We are known to comment, when we've done something horrible, that Mom will be "swirling her ashes".

Come on, that's gold!

So, New Years Eve comes along. One of the girls comments that a friend isn't coming because her dog has had a tumor removed. The dog isn't at home -- it's in another city sleeping off the anesthesia -- but the girl cannot leave the home because of the dog's tumor. In comes my dark humor.

That's ridiculous. I went out the New Year's Eve my mother had a tumor!

*silence and awkward glances*

Later on, they mentioned the girl would be able to keep the tumor. Again, why do I not shut up? Instead, I said: So not fair! They didn't let me keep my mom's tumor.

I think I traumatized the entire group. In other news, when I die and get to heaven, my mother is going to kick my ass. I will likely spend my first few days in Glory sitting in the time out chair.