In 23 hours...

My orbit shifts once again.

My step mother arrives. Alone. In Canada. Speaking still very little English. For the first time since she and my Dad got married. My father does not arrive for another two days after her arrival. I am not sure if she even likes me - there have been things that say perhaps she doesn't. Maybe she is over all that and likes me fine. I don't know.

What I do know is I am living in the house she and my father shared for two months. I am sure she will be looking at the way I decorate, the way I behave as a hostess (in what was her home) and the way I keep house (or don't. Whichever may be the case.) She will be in my home for 6 or 7 weeks. Living in my basement which Ky recently vacated. I am keeping my own room. Which used to be her room.

My Dad doesn't arrive until late night two days later. Lyn was gracious enough to stay home for the weekend and clean (which she hates) and help entertain (which she hates) in exchange for me feeding her and sharing the puppies with her (which she loves).

I have been so stressed about this. About having the house looking perfect for her because I am sure she is going to judge me. Because if it were me, I would judge me. And, yes, I am judging you too. Shape up.

But also, I was supposed to have two weeks with just Dad - having our family mostly back in place. (I was going to make a tactless dead Mother joke here, but am refraining. Please feel free to insert your own.) I guess that this time I resent her taking my time away from my father and making me split it with this woman I don't know. I miss my Dad. And since he's not the dead parent, I would appreciate having time to spend with him.

And if you know anything about my relationship with my father, you know how insane this sounds to me.

On a positive note, Janny and Lyn spent many hours helping me clean today. The Guy is coming over tomorrow before the football game to help with some details I am unable to do. The house is spotless.

And the step mother will likely have two days worth of jet lag.

A girl can hope.