Friday, February 23, 2007

Warning

***Note: This is to be read tongue in cheek. Apparently, it confused some people.***


Las Vegas is also known as "Sin City". DO NOT GO THERE. It is riddled with sin. Bad people do bad things there at an alarming rate. I repeat. DO NOT GO THERE.

I didn't know this when I booked my tickets. I thought the city sounded sweet and elegant. A place where people go to relax and pick flowers in meadows and wander quaint shops. But I have learned it is a bed of sin and debauchery.

How did I learn this? Let me tell you.

My aunt* emailed me. She said she had just heard from a friend that I am going to Las Vegas with my sister-in-law, Mel. My aunt said that she sincerely hoped I had a good time, but that she had some concerns with me going. She went to Vegas once (which she informed me was not her choice, she had to go) and found it to be quite an experience.

According to my aunt, people can smoke everywhere. Everywhere!! Can you imagine? Even on the streets!! And that's not the worst of it.

They drink. Everyone drinks in Las Vegas. They carry glasses of alcohol with them everywhere they go. They walk down the Strip** holding their glasses of liquid evil without a care in the world. Drunk people as far as the eye can see.

My aunt said the hotels were lovely and worth looking at. She didn't actually go into any of them, because - wait for it...

People gamble. Gambling. In hotels. In public. During the day!!!! The thought of people gambling did not sit well with her.

However, my aunt did say the temperature was quite bearable. Although, apparently, it goes as high as 40 degrees Celsius. I think it is likely the heat from the flames of hell.***

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*If my aunt is actually reading this... I may be shot. Anyone who reports this to said aunt and thus causes her to read this... they will be shot.

** With a name like "Strip", they should have expected something bad to come of it.

*** I didn't email my aunt back. I couldn't bear to tell her those were the exact reasons I was going.

4 comments:

  1. In the summer of 1991 my family did a huge 7 week long road trip and one of our stops was in Vegas. I was 10 at the time. And as for gambling, it is a "form of entertainment," which I'm not too worried about, unless you're being an idiot and gambling with the money set aside for things like, oh, you know, rent/mortgage, groceries, car payments, etc. I trust that as long as you leave your credit cards in your room, only gamble with an allotted amount of money, and see the gambling as entertainment and not a way to pay the bills, then you should be okay. As long as you aren't prone to addiction, because it sure is fun and hard to stop. All the lights are so flashy when you give the machine your money! It's pretty!!!

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  2. I think if I gambled my rent money in Vegas it would be difficult for me to continue to counsell problem gamblers. Might seem a bit hypocritical.

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  3. Julia H: I totally didn't mean you when I said some people were confused. (It reads like I did)Your comment was hysterical.

    I did however have more than one person ask why I was going to LV if I felt this way.

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  4. Were these people who don't normally read the blog? I thought it was pretty clear. But then, I'm really smart.

    Oh, your aunt's experience reminds me of the Simpson's when Homer's car is parked at 1 World Trade Center. Hilarious.

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Crap monkies say "what?"