Friday, January 07, 2011

Sleep, rinse, repeat

After sleeping for more than 30 hours in 2 days, I have found myself *bing* awake.  In case you are wondering, *bing* is the sound your brain makes when it is suddenly WIDE awake and ready for action.  *Bing* occurred to me tonight at 8:40pm.  After I'd already been asleep for an hour.

On Tuesday, my teeth started aching.  I was positive they were all about to fall out of my head as I had had numerous dreams the night before about needing dentures.  Now, my mother had dentures from long before I was born, but this is not for me and it caused no end of dream panic.  Once daytime teeth started hurting, it also lead to real life panic.  Then my gums were all swell-y and I was like "They are going to have to rip out all my teeth and that is going to be even more unsexy than my mouthguard!"  Then I looked it up on the Internet and found out I likely have an abscessed tooth.

After being in uber pain for a few hours, I called the dentist and requested an emergency appointment because SOMETHING TERRIBLE WAS HAPPENING.  I booked myself in for the next afternoon and assured myself I could continue to work despite the fact my teeth ache had moved into my head as well.  THe next day, I excused myself early from work and barely made it to the dentist without hurling out the car window as I drove.

I plop into the dentist chair and see the note sitting on the tray next to me.  It said "tooth hurts" in a condescending tone.  You can just tell the person who wrote it was rolling her eyes because I really couldn't be in that much pain, could I?  Yes, beyatch, I could be.

After a few Xrays, the dentist came in a poked and prodded.  She hit my teeth with a metal thingy to find out exactly which tooth hurt.  Then she made me bite on this other thing to narrow it down.  After clucking away to herself, she looked at the Xrays.  And determined she couldn't tell if it was an abscess.  Why?  Because my sinuses were so infected, it was causing all over swelling and making everything else unreadable.  Apparently, sinuses on an Xray are supposed to appear black on screen.  Mine?  Completely white.  Huh.

Another freaking sinus infection.  Over the last 3 1/2 years, I have had 5 or 6 a year.  Every time I go to the doctor, I have another sinus infection.  I am about ready to stick my head in a bucket of water, fill my sinuses to the brim and shake my head til they all clear out.  Even the Neti Pot doesn't work.  It helps, but it sure doesn't fix anything.

So, the sinus thing (which I'm so used to now I don't even notice) was causing so much pressure that the abscess that is likely growing is in pain long before they can even locate where it is.  I was sent on my merry way with a prescription for antibiotics.  At the last minute, the dentist asked if I needed something for the pain.  I agreed and damn near jumped over the tray to hug her.

It wasn't until I filled the prescription and was getting talked to by the pharmacist that I realized I had been prescribed Oxycontin.  Now, I'm really glad the pharmacist explained how I was to take it because from everything I'd seen on TV, I was going to need a spoon, a lighter, a needle and a tie off for my arm.

Now I've been home for 2 days.  I've taken 2 Oxy's (one each day) and one day they helped, the next day they did not.  Between the teeth pain, the head pain, the sinus pain and the exhaustion, I've been a mindless mess.  I had 4 naps yesterday and that was even with going to bed by 7:30pm.  Impressive.  Even for me.

But it seems I have met the end of the sleeping part of our program.  I have to admit.  I miss it already.


  1. I take back what I said last night, you're a bigger mess than me. Winner!

  2. She is a terrible mess until she has had her morning coffee. Then she is just an ordinary mess.

  3. Jamie: It's just about beating you really, otherwise, I'm sure I'd be normal!

    Dad: That is just untrue. I don't even like coffee!


Crap monkies say "what?"