Monday, January 04, 2010

Cooking is dangerous and will disfigure you

I wanted my first post of the year to be thought provoking and interesting.  But that was before my stove tried to kill me.

This year, like every year before, I have resolved to eat better, exercise more, make more food at home, eat out less, etc.  This year's plan, like every year before, will likely fade out in about 3 weeks, but for now, it's the plan.

One of the easiest ways for me to eat well is to have lots of healthy food available that will not take long to prepare.  If I have little baggies of pre-cooked chicken ready, I am more likely to make salads with chicken on top or something like that.  It's a good plan and usually works for me.

However, it starts with the need to cook a whole bunch of chicken.  I spread 6 chicken breasts on a cooking rack and baked it.  When I knew it was done, I put on my oven mitt (I've burned myself before and did not want to do it again!) and opened the oven door.  I leaned in to get the chicken out and as I did, I bumped the oven door with my leg, closing it on my arm.

I ran it under cool water until it stopped hurting.  I followed the instructions in my First Aid book.  I ignored the pain and waited.  An hour later, I checked under the bandage.  It is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen!!!!  And now I will show you.

This is the outside of my arm.  The wrinkles are from the bandage (I cannot have anything near me that doesn't leave wrinkles on my skin!).  The blister is disgusting and the skin around it is super sore.  It hurts lots and I am pouty.

This just goes to show you, cooking will kill you.  Order take out.


  1. Aww that totally sucks. Take care my friend and be as pouty as you need to.

  2. I too, my throw up.

    I am frightened for your safety at all times, Bronny.

  3. Your brother04/01/2010, 20:31

    HA HA HA.

  4. Ouch! Jeeze. Be careful. I would hate for you to be unrecognizabley disfigured next time I see you.

    P.S. Best masthead ever.

  5. I am so sorry that food preparation is deadly for you. Do you have scars from knife attacks too?

    Tanya got two bad burns on her hand over the holidays. They have pretty much healed. Too much hurry.

  6. "I'm terrified to use the Wii Fit. I have a feeling it will say I am 63 and nearing death".

    Listen, SmartAss I am 62 and nowhere near death (I hope).

    I like your red shoes topper.

  7. Aww pumpkin.

    Remember when I burnt my fingertips off pulling something out of the oven when we lived together?

    Remember when I shoved my fingers into a mug of bacon grease?

    I'm glad we don't live in the same kitchen anymore.

  8. prairie nymph05/01/2010, 19:08

    good thing is that burns turn into cool scars that you can scare kids with. except that the scars tend to sunburn easier. hmm.


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