I am currently sitting here scanning programs from funerals from relatives and friends in the last 10 years.
For any other person, this would be completely horrifying. For me? Well, it's a part of life and at least they aren't sitting in a box somewhere. Instead, they will be taking up Ks on the computer. Okay, on my father's computer.
I know many people are a little afraid of death. Either that or a little leery of speaking of it or just not often touched by it. As my father and I were reminiscing about the one month there were 6 or 7 funerals of friends and/or relatives, The Guy commented he likely had not been to that many funerals in his entire life. And he's not alone. A lot of friends haven't had a lot of deaths in their lives and so don't have the casual attitude that we (my family - immediate and extended) have acquired.
Don't get me wrong. Death is serious business. It sucks and I hate it and people die that I actually would have liked to have kept with me. But it's part of life and, for me, it's the living that is more important. I don't want to give Death that power. So, I scoff in the face of death.
We have a huge family. HUGE. Our immediate is just a normal size, but then we branch out. We are still in pretty regular contact with up to our 5th removed cousins. That makes a lot of relatives. It means that of 400 people in a room, we're related to (in some way, directly or indirectly) about 75% of them. Accordingly, a lot of relatives makes for a lot of weddings, babies, anniversaries, reunions, and funerals.
So you learn to put the emphasis on the good things. You mourn the dead - just ask anyone who watched me drool snot down my face at my mother's funeral - but you also learn to put Death in it's place. Because if you don't, it will drown you. So, I make inappropriate jokes about greasy faces, open caskets, stirring ashes, and the giant stack of funeral programs I currently have littering my table in front of me.
It's going to get us all one day. I'm going to get my shots in while I can.
Have you ever counted how many funerals you've been to? It's crazy. I know people my age that have never been to a funeral. SO WEIRD.
ReplyDeleteI had been to 1 before I started seeing Laura. My Great-Grandmother's, and she died when I was 17. Since then I still have not been to a single one for another member of my family but have been to 3 or 4 for members of her family, still not bad for 13 years of adulthood.
ReplyDeleteI did feel bad about missing my boss's funeral in January because he was a good guy and was taken way too soon...stupid cancer, but I don't need to tell anyone who reads this blog about that...but I was unable to physically get out of bed the day of his funeral...stupid back surgery.