Friday, October 10, 2008

It's been a ding-a-ling day

Today, I bought the dogs some penises. Or, is it peni? Well, I bought them dicks, at any rate. I didn't mean to do it. I never intended on feeding my dogs any genitalia at all.

But I did. I bought them penises. To eat.

In my own defense, I had no idea. I was at a feed store my Dad loves to get loud shirts at. I was buying new dog food and thought I would get the dogs a treat. I stumbled on these chews called Texas Toothpicks and thought, "Hey these are neat and pointy!"

I give them to the dogs later discover these innocent looking picks are picks of another kind. The bull variety to be specific. I don't even want to think about it, really. But, I know for sure, I am not going to be able to allow the dogs to kiss me ever again.

I keep thinking, "Dude. You've had a bull penis in your mouth." And he didn't buy dinner or anything.

Now the house smells like cow and the dogs are playing a game where they try to lick me and I run screaming. They think it's funny. I'm trying not to throw up.

In other news, the dog food I bought them smells like fish.

8 comments:

  1. Ok, I may have been wrong. This site http://www.dogtoys.com/teto12pa.html says they are beef "tails", but I think that is a lie because they don't want people to know they are dried penis!! That food is so stinky hey, but do the dogs like it?

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  2. They love them. We've had three knock down fights since I got home. So far, Maddy's won. What can I say? She really likes her penis.

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  3. HO-lee crap. That's awesome.

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  4. Everyone needs a good penis to eat every now and then.....right??


    peace
    #2

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  5. Dude, that is seriously f`ed up.

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  6. Sounds like a cock and bull story to me

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  7. Sigh. I just laughed at dad's joke.

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  8. My dog loves these--I don't! But it does keep him happily occupied. I find it's best not to tell a boy dog what that thing they are gnawing really is-- kind of like not mentioning your dog's impending "snip" to a man, unless you want to provoke the involuntary crotch protective maneuver. If you want to avoid the stank, do not evah! evah! evah!bring your dog a cow hoof. You're welcome.

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Crap monkies say "what?"