I found my cell phone. It was up my bum. Seriously. I searched the entire house, the car, the garage, the parking lot at work and the office. Then a coworker suggested she call the phone while I wander around. I found it in the van I was in on the way to the meeting. Under where I was sitting. I was looking for 3 hours for a phone that was under my butt. I am a moron.
But, on the plus side, I can now call my boyfriend!