He doesn't beg at the table, he sneezes. He sits nearest the person he thinks is the biggest sucker (this is usually me) and sneezes. Quietly at first. Then, a bit louder if he thinks you aren't listening.
If you hide his toy under a blanket -- even if he watched you do it -- he cannot find it. Same goes for food and his ball. He just looks at you in confusion and searches three feet to the left of where it is hidden.
If Monty does a bad thing, he will look at you with a blank look. You can yell at him in the second that he does something wrong and he will not have a clue what you are talking about.
The other night, we had some family over for supper. My uncle was in town, so he and my Dad's cousin and wife came over for supper. We were sitting in the living room having a nice conversation when Monty decided that would be the time to drag his bum on the carpet. I hollered at him mid-swipe and he just looked at me like nothing had happened.
I told the story that my Dad told me once about a really dumb dog. He was so dumb, he would bark at the closet when he wanted to go out. The owner of the dog felt so bad for him, she would give him a treat every time.
Sometimes I wonder if Monty is that kind of dumb. Just dumb enough to get away with everything.