Saturday, September 05, 2009

Vanity, vanity. Parking for vanity.

I am not the best driver.  However, when it comes to parallel parking, I am a pro-star.  I would rather parallel park than pull straight in.  But that's what you get when you learn to park an old school full sized van -- mad skillz. 

Sometimes I'm off my game and there is nothing as disheartening to me as a bad park.  But recently, it's been all good.  So when I saw the tight space just in front of one of our favourite haunts, I was pumped.  I would get to parallel park and there were a bunch of people loitering outside the neighbouring grill to view my abilities. 

I swung up beside the other car and flawlessly slid my car in.  Smooth and no corrections, I put my car into park with a smirk on my face.  Imagining I was on a commercial as a classy, tall, stunning woman who just showed all the men who is boss, I got out of the car, flung my purse over my shoulder and sauntered to the sidewalk to admire my handiwork.  I was the perfect distance from the curb.  I grinned. 

It was then I noticed that all the people had gone inside.  I was being vain all to myself.

Suddenly, I'm not so much impressive as pathetic.


  1. Awesome. Nothing quite like strutting your stuff and then discovering that no one cares.

    "I'm an excellent driver. Dad lets me drive slow in the driveway."

  2. Did Lyn ever tell you the time she was trying to parallel park and I was in the passenger side trying to coach her and I'm probably the worst parallel parker ever, second to Lyn, and I was like, "Ok, back up...turn to the left....ok, now turn to the right.." and she ended up sticking out half way into the street, worse off then when she started? It was like the blind leading the blind. If you were there you probably would have pretended you didn't know us.

    We gave up, by the way, and ended up walking many blocks to our destinations.

  3. I do stuff like that a lot. Except with stuff other than parking. No one watches the good stuff,though.

    The only time people seem to be watching me is when I am falling down or being chased by something.

  4. Bahaha. I had totally forgotten about that. I think our bad parallel parking skills combined to make for the worst park ever. It didn't help that we were both laughing so hard, either.

    Good times. Good times.


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