Friday, November 30, 2007

Why, Oh, why? Why do I try?

My toilet has been leaking. From the base where it sits on the floor. I watched Holmes on Homes and saw how simple it was to fix it myself. I asked The Guy to help and, although he had never done it before, he agreed. However, he has worked 5 13+ hour days this week, so I thought I would save him the trouble. My Dad was here, how hard could it be?

Never ask that question. Fate will let you know exactly how hard it could be.

I followed the instructions. Turn off the water to the toilet. Check. Unscrew the hose to the toilet. Check. Dad started taking the bolts off the base of the toilet. Che.... oh crap. (Pardon the use of the word.) The bolts are stripped.

Now come out the tools. Four grip vices later and a ton of excess wax from the ring under the toilet, we have a big mess and no bolt coming out. Time to cut the bugger off. Except that the hacksaw is in a box somewhere in the Ukraine. When Dad moved, he took it with him.

Off to Canadian Tire. Bought a mini hack saw and the necessary tools. Now it's just a matter of cutting the bolt, removing the wax ring, changing the bolts in the flange (it's a real word. Phoebe was right.) and putting it all together. How hard could it be?

Right... Now I have a hole where my toilet was. My toilet is in the hall. The flange won't come up because the pipe is too big, so I can't replace the bolts. The wax from the ring has spread all over the floor, the tools, my hands and the dogs. When I was removing the wax, I took off a piece that appears to be part of the pipe. And no one, I repeat no one, should have to look down the toilet pipe.

Now, I am getting dressed up fancy to go out for dinner and a party with a friend from work. I hope there is a bathroom there I can use.


  1. The funny thing is that Mike Holmes hates when people try to do these things themselves.

  2. I am thoroughly impressed that you've even done what you have..if it were me, the toilet would still be leaking...way to do things on your own..even if it's not turning out the way you'd like!


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